"A Sorta Fairytale"

On my way up north
Up on the ventura
I pulled back the hood
And I was talking to you
And I knew then it would be
A life long thing
But I didnt know that we
We could break a silver lining
And Im so sad
Like a good book I cant put this
Day back
A sorta fairytale
With you
A sorta fairytale
With you...

Anyhow, it´s all very convenient considering my state of mind those days. I went without really knowing what would come out of it, and then, a lifetime trying to forget what´s bad for me, there I had it, in front of my eyes all the time, calling me, whispering to me at night, not letting me sleep, coming to me and then going away.... I had a beautiful moment there in the sand, a very sad moment while the sun was going down, and I felt so sad I ....

I tried to come back to where I was before, and I must say, I have learned to be so bloody happy so why was I so sad down in the sand And I ride along sideAnd I rode along sideYou thenAnd I rode along sideTill you lost me thereIn the open road...

Le Pop Français par une artiste indonésienne

Je suis tres content d'avoir decouvert Anggun, une chanteuse de l'indonésie, tres belle, mais pas seulement ça: elle a aussi un grand talent, une voix douce et une personnalité charmante.

Si vous voulez savoir plus d'elle visitez www.anggun.com, son site web dans l'internet. Vous pouvez aussi apprécier quelques chansons sur le site web www.youtube.com, simplement tapez 'Anggun' dans le boîte de recherche.

Je vour recommande 'neige sur le Sahara', 'cesse la pliue' et, mon favori 'juste avant toi'. Je suis sur que vour l'aimerez bien!

Two Chinese

I am quite disappointed in my colleagues here at Petardosis Total. The terms of their (unwriten, unpaid) contract clearly specify that they must contribute to the cult-blog on a regular basis. Yet, over a week has passed without a single new article being published.

Beatruska had the very, very feeble excuse of being on holidays (that's right, on holidays again), and to be buying a flat in Madrid. And I ask myself: do you think Bea, that out readers should be impacted by your personal affairs? I find it deeply unprofessional and, if this were Spain, probably a sackable offence...

The only mitigating element that I can see is that the property that Bea has just purchased (see photo - the one with the laundry hanging out) will soon be refurbished to become the Madrid HQ for Petardosis.


On the other hand, Juanin has also neglected his obligations towards our readers, very briefly reporting on a per-chance with a passing musclemary whilst promenading around the dunes of Playa del Ingles... Not only that, he used jargon in his article, which in turn forced me to post a clarification. And he didn't even get the telephone number of the 'jamelgo' (did you learn nothing here in London with me!).

Trevor is, as yet, absent from our roll of honour having failed to contribute since he joined. Yes, I know, he might have been busy attending all the club openings and DJing at the most exclusive parties in London and the South East, but all that means nothing to our readers if he doesn't even bother reporting on them (or indeed include the name of the Editor in Chief in the guest list...)

And what about me, you may wonder? Well, I have been hard at work researching the net and looking for interesting things to bring to our readers. Want an example? There:


If you want more (and why wouldn't you since I am recommending it) go to www.youtube.com and type 'two chinese' on the search box.

They're cute and funny (even for a person that has never been attracted to fellas with elongated eyelids), and some may even say talented (it took five American guys to mime the same songs). Gripping stuff, I know, but what would I not do for my readers...

Clarificacion: tomar sopa y comer sopa...

Tomar sopa, vamos una sopita bien caliente, que te pone a tono y te deja como nuevo y preparado para meterte en la cama...


... o comer sopa, que te ponga bien caliente y a tono, te deje hecho polvo pero con ganas de mas y sonando que nunca te deje salir de la cama.

Taxi trouble

Another day on the bike to and from the office, another day that I nearly get knocked down by a taxi.
Taxi drivers are famously poor drivers in denial, but the problem with that is that at the wheel, they become potential killers.
I have lived in London for over eight years, nearly four of them using my bike (one or other, as they all get stolen in the end...), and in all this time as a very, very careful and respectul cyclist, I have gotten knocked down quite a few times, most of them, by taxis.
Yeah, they are all of the same sort wherever you go, but here in London it's much worse than I have experienced anywhere. They are fucking wankers at best, murderers and rapists on bail at worst.
I'm so fed up with letters on the newspapers putting cyclists at the centre of trouble... we are the weakest link in the traffic chain and it is in our best interest to be careful.
A bit of respect from other drivers is only reasonable, but taxi drivers... they've only got one thing in their heads: their assholes.

Que dificil es ser guiri...

Que no te lo crees? Parate a pensarlo por un momento. Acuerdate de lo que pensabas de los guirilondos cuando venian a la pizzeria donde trabajaste aquel verano hace dos anyos...
Pero mira como esta de rosita el cabron ese, que si es que son unos desesperados, que si la guambita por aqui, que si el chipiron por alla...


Es mas, no han venido a nuestro pais? Pues que se pongan a hablar en Espanol, igual que nosotros nos molestamos en aprender Ingles cuando vamos a Inglaterra.
Que quieres que? Unna servewza peu faver? Y un par de huevos, ahora lo intentas otra vez, y hasta que no me de a mi la gana te puedes olvidar de la servewza esa o lo que sea que me quieras pedir.
No, si aunque me utilizes tus manos y las de tus companeros no me voy a enterar, a ver, vete a casa y te pillas un libro, y cuando sepas pronunciar lo que quieres, entonces te pasas, bonito.
Que donde esta lo que? Wachu-wachu? Que no, que no se que conyo me cuentas, anda tira para alla y deja de molestarme que de doy un cate asi con la mano abierta que te voy a dejar un marca la colleja esa rosa que tienes...
En fin, que todos lo hemos hecho alguna vez, verdad? Si es que a veces nos levantamos con el sentimiento ese de que le vas a joder el dia a un guiri, y cuando esto te viene, te viene. Ese dia en que no sabes si vas a utilizar tu poder para hacer el bien, o para hacer el mal...
This Summer, spare a guiri.

Wish returns to Rush on Friday 11th August…

Phew what a scorcher… a summer of glittering parties continues as the crew from Wish get together again to slap each others sunburn and tan each others hides in another down and dirty get-together under the lights and lasers at Rush this coming Friday 11th August.


The mixin minxes DJ Tee and Kath Harding are cueing up the cuts and bringing you the very best jackin funk tech electro deep classic nouveau fidget funky past present and future house, and a whole lot more besides.
Come on, rinse out your best knickers, pump up your disco tits and get yourselves down to Wish…

Wish
7pm till 1am every second friday of the month at Rush, 25 Frith St, Soho
Wish fans don’t forget the all-singing all-dancing boat party on the Thames with Council on August bank holiday…
(Trevolin)

We are going on a Summer holiday...

No realmente, pero parecido. Es Sabado 5 de Agosto y es el Pride en Brighton.
Cualquier marica en Londres podria ser perdonado por pensar (incluso decir?) que ya esta bien de prides, que no hace falta tener cinco al anyo para demonstrar lo orgullosos que estamos de ser unas reinas...
Pero el Brighton Pride es diferente, mejor que el Europride, que este anyo se celebraba en Londres, y que el Soho pride, que se celebro este anyo por segunda vez en el barrios con mas marimusculos de la ciudad (pero con Vauxhall pisandole los talones).
La question, o el tomate del asunto, es que el Brighton Pride tienen lugar, como su nombre indica, en Brighton, un pueblo costero en el sur de Inglaterra, a solo una hora de la capital.
Este pride se celebra en un parque, tiene carpas con musica provista por los clubs mas grandes de Londres, barbacoas, chiringuitos, feria con atracciones, etc.
Se podria decir que el London Pride, ahora difunto (y parcialmente reemplazado por los otros cuatro o cinco que tienen lugar en la capital) era todo eso y mas.


Pero la verdad es que habia una diferencia muy fundamental. Una que ha hecho que uno se convierta en el mas concurrido de UK y el otro se precipite hacia la extincion: el precio.
Analizemos esto mas detenidamente. Acceso al Brighton Pride (BP) es gratuito mientras que el London Pride (LP) costaba £28 por adelantado y £35 en la puerta. En el BP te puedes llevar tu comida y tu bebida si quieres y hacer un picnic, de hecho muchas familias lo hacen y comparten el parque con las marilolis mientras disfrutan de la musica. Y tambien lo hacemos algunos de nosotros.
En el LP no podias meter ni una botella de agua. Si querias agua tenias que pagarla a precio de crudo. Y ni pensarlo el llevarse un bocata de chorizo!
La diferencia es que el BP esta apoyado por el Ayuntamiento, no contribuyendo dinero, sino permitiendo que tenga lugar sin cobrar a los organizadores porque el Pride es bueno para Brighton y que por otro lado es organizado por una associacion sin animo de lucro.
En Londres el Pride era organizado por una empresa privada, con mucho animo de lucro,y sin el apoyo del Ayuntamiento, que no veia el Pride como una atraccion turistica o simplemente algo que muchos en Londres disfrutarian.
Y las mariperlas hemos votado y hemos elegido el BP, porque es una celebracion donde la gente va a pasarselo bien y disfrutar de la musica, al contrario que el LP, que no era mas que otra oportunidad para que una empresa se llenase los bolsillos (o no, como ha sido el caso).
Ah, y el ultimo factor es que el BP siempre tiene buen buen tiempo, mientras que el LP siempre tiene lluvia. Dios tambien prefiere el Brighton Pride.
Bien hecho, Brighton!

Coq au vin - I thought that was sex in a lorry

With Beatrix going away for a break, those left behind carry on with even greater dedication to bringing you quality news and analysis on current, and rather personal affairs.

And here at Petardosis Total hardly a day goes by without the announcement of another world-famous celebrity joining the editorial team.

No, I'm not talking about June Brown (Eastender's own Dot Cotton), I am talking about Trevor (aka Trevol, Trevolin, Trevolon, DJ Tee, etc), a boutique marketteer from Manchester, and responsible for successes such as holidays abroad, shopping, the Eiffel Tower and little puppies.

London-based Trevor will report on subjects ranging from the declining capacity to go out and have fun of the post-young (Government speak for those between the ages of 25 and 44), to the complexities of growing traditional British lawn in mediterranean coastal areas.

He will also tell us the surprising story of how he managed to resurect Music and transform it into the multi-billion pounds business that it is today.

A very warm welcome to you, Trevor, and we hope that you enjoy this new period as our Director of Scene and New Trends in Music.